In our day to day life for any event we tend to react all the time rather than respond. The reaction may have positive or negative impact on any given situation event or incident, which may cause irreversible effect or loss in professional or personal relations (interpersonal and intrapersonal). It also affects the reacting person too as in person makes its impression on others.
For example, if we are driving a car on a road and some fellow driving person happens to slip on road due to any reason first reaction we give ‘What a fellow! Don’t even know how to drive! rather than stopping side by and asking him whether he is fine or not. On major scale if any road accident happens People first give their reaction in form of abusive words or provoking actions. That tends to create a negative environment or vibrations in our surroundings as well as on our self also. Usually it starts from the point where we let out the urge to speak or act on incident without thinking, in the form of reaction.
Many people who attempts suicide are nothing but reaction for incident. In such a case, the person who reacts or the person or circumstances due to which it happened may face irreversible loss or regret for life time.
Then one might think how should we do or face such a situation? The answer is responding rather than react. Question comes how should we respond instead of reacting? One example given may help you to understand.
Suppose a kid merely 4-5 years is playing in home and he accidently breaks an artifact or any crockery lying in kitchen or wherever, as a parent first thing we do to shout on kid in all possible way. This but natural reaction comes as parent. It’s a small and possibly quite normal incident in any home with a kid.
But my dear friends this small incident may have two effects
- Firstly, if a kid again commits any such kind of mistake he or she will be always scared of you, which eventually tend to hide the mistakes. Well sometimes hidden mistakes can create a problem. It also hampers child’s confidence in trying anything new. Such kids usually tend to shy and don’t share anything with parent. It may create in confidence in child’s mind about parent/s.
- Second, if you tend to react in same manner for all thing’s kinds become ignorant to things which may be important for him/her. He or she may develop grudge against parents.
When such an incident happen takes a deep breath and tries to calm oneself. Deep breath helps to reduce your anxious condition due to incident and calms your mind by various physiological actions. Think for a while and try to analyze the situation. Then help the kid with clearing up the mess and in polite way try to make him/her realize the mistake. Also tell to avoid such thing in future. With this method Kid will always keeps it in mind as lesson
Well with this technique if we can respond rather than react, we can improve our relations with others and avoid complicating the incidents.
Kamini R. Gangurde